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Why do we fear being judged?

How to be the most boring presenter

Often when addressing potential speakers, I put it to them that one of the worst fears as a presenter or speaker is the fear of being judged. We are our own worst critics, or can be, naturally, however, what do we know of our audience?

When we assume that they are judging us, we too are guessing – we’re making assumptions that they are thinking certain things and making conclusions about us.  Perhaps the conclusions we assume they are making are in fact our own fears of ourselves and our lack of performance as a presenter or speaker. Perhaps we are making the assumptions that those judgment calls we think others are making are in fact our own inhibitions coming to the surface.

What do you think? Are you one to make these judgement calls yourself? What have you done about it to get over it?  The fact is that judgement, or fear of, can make or break a speaker and can turn your presentations around – for better or for worse.

Assume for a moment that you’re thinking the absolute worst before taking that first step on to the platform or before stepping in front of the camera…. how do you think your presentation is going to work out? Not so great. That’s a given.

Now let’s assume you have put all judgements aside and are now considering how fabulous you are going to be, how much your audience can’t wait to hear what you have to say and how amazing you’re going to feel once you step away from the audience and their applause. Not bad eh? Bit of a contrast?

Let’s face it. We are not mind-readers and we can’t possibly know what our audience is thinking. Secondly, do a self-check and establish whether those fears of inadequacy are in fact a means to rectify something, learn more or even change something for the better.

I put it to you… consider it. What have you got to gain? What would it mean to you to turn your thinking around and approach your stage or video presentations from a different angle to your norm?

Lose the judgement call and get yourself right. Then, when you get on the platform, remember it’s not about you, it’s about them and what you’re delivering. If we shift that focus and deliver what they came for, then they’ll be happy and so will we… all judgements aside.

What’s a vision board?

Call them vision boards, treasure maps, mindmaps, hope boards, bucket boards, whatever you like – essentially they all have the same purpose – to remind you to get motivated and start achieving what you really want in life. Ok, let’s not get too profound – there’s enough of that D & M stuff going around on social media to drive you bananas.

Let’s keep it short and sweet. If you’re asking ‘What’s a vision board?’ Then you may not have one of those wonderful colourful boards where you’ve stuck up pictures from magazines, newspapers, articles and other glossies.  If you have, great!  Good on you!  I’m all for it.  It works for me. The more I see it, the more I want it, the more I’m determined to get it.

Imagine if you applied that principle to your speaking skills? Just imagine you took photos or images of people that you really admire as great speakers and presenters and put them on a vision board. What do they mean to you? What is it about their presentations that inspires you and makes you want to be so much more of a presenter than you already are? It may be that they’re a fashionista or have superb dress sense, it may be that they stand in a certain way, have a great voice etc. Then, easy peasy… find images that represent those exact same things, and image of someone standing the way you would like to, an image of someone with a great voice, a piccie of someone who looks brilliant, even in a singlet.

Spread the inspiration around and keep it around you. The more you see it, the more you’re likely to act upon it.

Remember, your vision board, doesn’t have to be a board as such.  It could be a poster collage, a photo album, a journal, a book with lots of blank pages ready to be filled, a group of sketches……. whatever works for you.  Just remember to keep looking at it.

Go for it. Start it today… right now 🙂

How to get your audience on side

How to get your audience on sideWell, there’s that old adage… fake it until you make it. But…..

When you’re on the platform, if you’re faking it… Guess what? You’ve lost them. Your audience is going to see right through it. They want to see the genuine you, the real thing, the raw stuff, the truth, the vulnerable, the honesty and the personality. So often presenters take on a ‘persona’ they consider the audience expects to see and hear. Some presenters truly believe that their audience wants them to perform in a certain way, to adopt a pause-free, stumble-free delivery. They truly believe that if they don’t ‘sound’ a certain way, or adopt a certain stance, or deliver in a certain manner, that their audience is not going to be impressed. Well, in many ways, that’s true – if you look at it this way….

Adopt a certain stance, sound a certain way and deliver in a manner that you truly believe your audience wants to see and hear, and you may have them on side… IF you’re genuine. IF it’s coming from the heart. IF it’s the real you. If it’s not …. then, they’ll know and if you haven’t lost them in the first 10 seconds, you will shortly thereafter.

Be true to yourself and you can then be true to your audience. Show them what you’re made of. Show them what really makes you tick. Now… chances are 100% of your audience will not be onside… if they are.. .brilliant!, but if not, then it doesn’t matter. We can’t please everyone all of the time, so most of them most of the time works well! Let your personality shine through and share the joy around. It’s you they’ve come to see, not some ‘fake it until you make it’ puppet.

It’ll be worth your effort.

 

50 Ways to Feel Good – 2. Indulge in a Massage

Indulge in a MassageSo, isn’t it about time you indulged in a massage of sorts?  Could be remedial, deep tissue, head massage, foot massage, hand massage or all of the above!  Do you know someone who is studying such an art and needs a test dummy?  Guess what?  You’re it!  Take some time out for yourself and lift your feet up, remind yourself of how good it feels to get that blood circulating again.

 

 

 

 

50 Ways to Feel Good - Deanna RobertsLike what you see? Get your copy of ‘50 Ways to Feel Good‘ from Amazon today!

How to get yourself on the radio

How to get yourself on radioSo…. you’ve done something inspirational and want to get it out on the airwaves right?  Here’s a few ideas on how to get yourself on the radio.

Having been in the community radio industry for 12 years, I can tell you that if you’re willing to pay for advertising, which is not expensive…., you can almost advertise anything you want (within rules, regulations and guidelines of course).

However, there are a few ‘unpaid’ options too…

  1. Approach your local radio station (look them up on http://www.cbaa.org.au (if you’re in Australia))
  2. Ask whether they’d be interested in broadcasting a segment that covers your expertise
  3. Make sure your information would be of community interest and service
  4. You may be required to advertise with the radio station as part of the deal…. or not…
  5. If you’re hosting a non-profit event, ask them about advertising in their Community Service Announcements (CSA’s) for free
  6. Ask if they host a program specifically aimed at your expertise, eg new authors, or new speakers, or new inventions for example – you may be able to join in on a group chat, or organise a 1 on 1 interview
  7. Be prepared to make a donation to the station – community stations are mostly (if not 100%) run by volunteers and it’s donations, memberships and sponsorships that keep the station going. You may not be asked for a donation, but then again, you might.

Contact your local radio station for advertising/sponsorship options too. You may even want to record your own ads!

All good fun…

50 Ways to Feel Good – 1. Donate to Charity

50 Ways to Feel Good - Donate to CharityTaken from the book ’50 Ways to Feel Good’ – here’s one of the things you can do that doesn’t take a lot of effort, or a lot of time, or a lot of money! It’s completely up to you. It’s all about giving and getting a buzz out of doing so.

Take the time to look through your wallet or purse and put even the smallest amount into a money box. When it’s full, count it up and take it to your nearest charity. They’ll love you, no matter how much is in there! Too easy.

 

50 Ways to Feel Good - Deanna RobertsLike what you see? Get your copy of ‘50 Ways to Feel Good‘ from Amazon today!

I don’t know what to write about

I don't know what to write aboutStuck for ideas?  Simple solution… keep a journal.

In all the workshops I’ve ever held on public speaking, keeping a journal has been right up there in the list of ‘must have’s’.  Journals can be full of so many ideas, thoughts, brainwaves, others’ ideas, inspirations, sketches, notes to self, whatever….

Journals don’t have to be a ‘Dear Diary’ kind of deal.  Keeping one beside you to add to at any time is a really good idea.  I once met a sales guy who had more than tripled his income in 2 years, from earning around $500k per year to over $2 mill per year.  How?  He kept a journal.  He wrote down everything that came to mind that he thought was a good idea and when he needed ideas, he had a library full of them.

Losing sleep?  Write down those brilliant ‘blind flashes of the obvious’ (or BFO’s – thanks Fabian Dattner :)) and unload your mind.  Do a mental dump into a journal – it’ll still be there next time you want to source it.  As fate would have it, next time you need an idea, are stumped for what to write about or just need some inspiration, you’ll pick up a journal and probably open it to exactly the right page.

Got a funny idea?  Add it to the journal.  Got a brainwave while having a shower?  Add it to the journal.

Too easy 🙂

How to get heard on the radio

How to get heard on the radioIf you’re in business, or planning an event of some sort, then you want people to hear about it right?  You want to know how to get heard on the radio?  How are you going to do that?

It’s about getting yourself on air and online.  Now.  Today.  Tomorrow and the next day.  If you’re already a radio show host, brilliant.  You’ve got some inroads there.  If not, then think about a podcast, an online video, a Google Hangout, a Skype chat, a regular online TV show – something you can either broadcast live, or pre-record and put to air later.

Organise interviews.  Consult the experts.  You’re not expected to know everything so find someone who knows a lot more about your topic than you do.  You won’t be perceived as the expert necessarily but you’ll certainly earn more creds by being the go-to person for resources.  Build up a collection of interviews, get them transcribed (with the guest’s permission of course) and before you know it, you have a book to sell and a product to offer to other stations.

The potential is huge.  It all comes down to time and commitment…. both yours and your audience’s.  Plan it today and make it happen.

10 things not to do with your video presentation

10 things not to do with your video PRLet’s cut to the chase…. you’re in business…. you’re wanting to promote it and record something on video, right?

Well, that’s all good and well, but there are so many things that can risk your professionalism, reputation and credibility going down the tube…

Having coached many business owners on how to present on a platform and on camera, here are 10 tips I came up with on what NOT to do in front of the camera….

  1. Read a teleprompter up really close so that your audience can see your eyes moving
  2. Look like you just got out of bed
  3. Get someone to record you who has never done it before
  4. Give the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the whole idea
  5. Avoid the lens completely
  6. Lecture in a demanding and forthright tone
  7. Find a blank wall between 2 doorways so that you can see shadowed edges
  8. Forget lighting
  9. Keep it out of focus
  10. Sound like you’re doing the hard-sell

These are just a few. I’m sure there are more you could add. Keep them in mind when recording your next video. Most of all, keep it natural, keep it sincere and keep it real.

Too easy.

Tennis anyone?

Julie Fidler & Brenda Foster - The Princess Pursuit 2014Our speakers at this year’s Princess Pursuit event are Julie Fidler and Brenda Foster – World ranked tennis champions with fabulous stories to tell.  (You can read more about them here). They’re going to share their passion for tennis including national and international competition, their experiences on and off the court, how they balance business, home, family and en tout cas and how they’ve overcome those challenges that face women in competitive sports.  They’re loaded with personality, enthusiasm and zest for life and we can’t wait to share their stories with you at this year’s event.  We’ll see you there!

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